• Christian Counseling: Here’s the Truth About Fear

    In my Christian Counseling work with women, one of the biggest obstacles that I see getting in the way for all of us is fear. It stops us from achieving things we feel drawn to and want to make important in our lives. It’s something I personally have struggled with for a long time.

    Fear’s main goal is to keep us small and not allow us to walk in the purpose God has planned for us. 

    Fear doesn’t want us to be used for the Kingdom. Fear doesn’t want us to reach out and have an impact on our family, our neighborhood or even the world. Fear wants us paralyzed with doubt. It’s a formidable foe.

    How do we defeat it? 

    I support my Christian Counseling clients to stay focused on what’s true. Fear uses lies to keep us in line. It lies to us about who we are, what we are capable of, and the power others have over us in order to keep us submissive and quiet. 

    When we realize we have been created with unique gifts and talents in order to make a real difference in our world, we shatter those lies. But that’s a process. It comes from one of my favorite Scriptures: 

    2 Timothy 1:7 – “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-control.”

    Fighting Fear Tip #1: Step boldly out of the shadows. (POWER)

     You will never be free from fear if you don’t put one foot in front of the other and step outside your comfort zone. That’s how you grow. The more you believe fear, the smaller your life gets – the less impact you have. But when you decide to test its lies and try something you feel drawn toward, that’s when you see it was all a mirage. Your world didn’t come crumbling down. You survived. It may have been uncomfortable, but you’re still here.

    Fighting Fear Tip #2: You must own and honor who you truly are. (LOVE)

    Our society puts a lot of pressure on us to look and act like everyone else. I say, “Embrace who you truly are!” If you’re not good at something, maybe that’s not your gift. 

    Be honest with yourself. Is it something you need to learn or let go of? I am not overly outgoing in large crowds and they exhaust me. It was an epiphany moment when I realized that describes an introvert! That meant I wasn’t a failure, I was just trying to do things outside of the way God created me. Once I recognized that aspect of myself, I was able to honor it by changing my schedule and the way I do things to fit better with who I am.

    Fighting Fear Tip #3: You must be realistic (SELF-CONTROL)

     I spent too many years trying to be this outgoing, perfect mom who had a perfect house and made perfect meals all while plastering a fake smile on my face about my perfect life. Let me tell you, that didn’t get me closer to perfection! Instead, I was frustrated, irritable and anxious because I knew no matter what I did, I couldn’t achieve those goals. I couldn’t do it on my own, I needed God’s help to recognize what was in my control and what wasn

    Frequently in Scripture, God describes Himself as our “shield.” Are you boldly holding yours up high, or cowering behind it in a ball? It’s not easy. It takes practice and sometimes having some extra support along the way can make a big difference. If having someone walk beside you, guiding and cheering you on sounds good, give us a call. We’d love to talk to you about what Christian Counseling looks like.